Blogging, redirected.

I was going to write a post on deep thoughts provoked by Jen Hatmaker's posts on Easter, but that was before I stepped in dog crap this morning.  Now those thoughts are gone and replaced by negative thoughts and feelings.  I have yet to go outside and spray said dog crap off my cute deck shoes because I need to work up the desire to meet with fecal matter once again today.  The frustrating points of stepping in dog crap today were:
1. We don't own a dog and neither do our neighbors so where the hell did the dog crap come from?
2. I ran all the way to school behind M's bike and didn't notice I had stepped in dog crap.
3. I ran all the way home and got in the van to go to the chiropractor and didn't notice I had stepped in dog crap.
4. I laid down on the adjustment table and didn't notice I had stepped in dog crap.
5. I smeared dog crap all over my other shoe, my jeans, the adjustment table and STILL didn't notice that I had stepped in dog crap until Dr. Bob came in and let me know that there was DOG CRAP all over the place. 

So I walked out of Dr. Bob's barefoot like a cast member of an Appalachian Emergency Room skit on SNL and headed back home. 

*If you look closely, you can see a pretty unique-looking squashed caterpillar on the bottom of my crap-filled shoe.  I'm sure this is God's humorous way of reminding me that there is beauty amidst the mess.

Bennett's Brigade

I know that I get frustrated sometimes by the struggles I endure with my girls, but this video by my friend Breck puts it all in perspective.  We may be fighting to put shoes on in the morning (Miss M) or to wear pants (JJ), but we are not fighting for their lives.  Breck is my KD pledge daughter and I am very proud to be able to call her my sister.  I know that sounds mixed up, but anyone who was Greek in college knows what I'm talking about.  Please watch the video and be support Breck and her family through prayer or other means if you feel led to do so.  Or just a post of encouragement I'm sure would do wonders. 

"So tell me a little bit about yourself..."

I hate this question.  Usually, hours after I'm asked, I come up with something like this:

I like to travel.
I hate Gorgonzola and blue cheeses.
I only like cilantro in salsas.
I have a wicked spider bite scar/story.
I strongly dislike horror movies, but I love a good suspense/thriller.
I have no desire to bungee jump.
I have been spelunking and rappelling a few times.
I love to camp.
I can kayak. 
I am a former beauty pageant contestant, but only as a runner-up, although I did win Ms. Congeniality.
When it comes to sushi, I only eat California rolls because I don't like raw fish.
I play the violin, but not very well.
I like to run, even though today I'm having a hard time getting motivated - hence the blogging.
I have a strong aversion to people who lie.
I can't keep a secret from my husband.
My best friends are like my family.
I worked in a large animal vet clinic once. 
Parenthood is my favorite TV show. 
I have two little girls. 
They are not at all who I expected - they are even better than that.
I'm from Columbia, Missouri and went to Mizzou.
I was an English major, Art History minor.
I played club soccer - wasn't good enough for Varsity but I love the game.
I've had my heart broken a few times.
Not just for reasons of love, but also by life.
It's made me stronger. (cue Kelly Clarkson or Kayne West song)
In another life, I would be an interior decorator.  Or a nurse.
I read the Twilight and Hunger Games series, but not Harry Potter.
I didn't go to my first high school reunion.  Not sure about the second. 
17 years ago I would have pegged myself as someone who would.
I'm glad I'm not the same person I was 17 years ago. 

Borders' Loss, My Gain

A few weeks back when Borders was having their liquidation sale, I bought several books I didn't really need, but I also snagged a huge bulletin board for $10.  The same size at The Container Store was $70 and this one was in great condition and needed just some paint and fabric (it's Dwell Studio and unfortunately at $16/yard was more expensive than the actual bulletin board, but I fell in love with it).  This morning I finished it - and it looks great!  I can't wait for Jeff to hang it up in the girls' room.  Yes, I have a fear of hanging things on plaster walls so I need my husband to do it for me.  I'm excited to see the cute things that M & JJ want to put up.

Tackling the To-Do-List

There have been 3 or 4 things on my to-do-list for awhile now and I've crossed a few of them off in the last few days:

Dr.'s appt. (Friday)
Finish bulletin board for girls' room (in progress)
Get maternity & kids clothes ready to sell/get rid of (in progress)
Thompson Center paperwork (currently working on and taking a break to talk about how laborous it is to fill out pages and pages of questions regarding the last 6 years of M's life.)

Seriously - I should have kept better records when she was a baby because I can't remember when she first rolled over or ate her first grape, or gave her first monologue.  NO, she has wasn't waxing poetic as a toddler, but I do remember the first time she said "I love you" and sang the alphabet, and it was way earlier than she was supposed to because it freaked.me.out.  Thanks to the wonder of camcorders, we have a few of these things on tape so the exact dates are known.  I remember being worried about JJ because she was 18 months and didn't know all of her colors and geometric shapes.  Not to worry, I was told.  That's what they call NORMAL. 

Filling out these forms makes me feel, once again, that I am way more in touch with M's development than JJ's.  It brings on the mom guilt even more.  Also the fact that M got her educational diagnosis of Autism in March and her neurologist suggested back in May that we go to the Thompson Center and I am just now getting around to finishing the stack of forms.  What can I say, I was overwhelmed.  I always feel overwhelmed.

I went to counseling this morning and of course severely depleted the supply of Kleenex in her office.  And now I have golf ball eyes for the rest of the day.  I swear, sometimes when I pick up the girls I think their schools think I'm on drugs because my eyes are red and puffy.  And you would think after 4 years I would be done with counseling, but after several starts and stops, I am right back there.  And I recently started over with a new counselor, which is so hard because you have to retell things so that they have context.  Exhausting.  So after I got back and realized that I couldn't really go anywhere else today where people might see my face, I figured I would finally get this packet ready to go in the mail.  It's taken me all afternoon, but I am almost finished.

Damn you, flip flops.

You are the choice of shoe for my 6-year old, and I hate you.  You are the reason that the soles of her feet are now permanently black.  I blame you for her skinned knee last week on the way to school and this morning for the twisted ankle because you provide absolutely. no. shock. support.  So I had to drag my daughter a block and a half to school with a few "we've all been there"'s and "rough morning, huh"'s tossed my way as she screamed at the top of her lungs.  And it's all your fault.  I would like to hurl you into the fire pit this evening while I have a stiff drink to celebrate.  But I know the power you have over my child and that would reduce us to hillbillies the next day when she walked in barefoot to school.  My search for a replacement for you has cost me lots of cash - Five Fingers for kids, indoor soccer shoes, many a pair from Stride Rite.  I know this is strong, but I might hate this aspect of her Asperger's/Sensory stuff more than the withholding of stools.  Yes, I may despise you more than cleaning up poop. 

Barn Light Electric Giveaway!

Even if I didn't live in a 75-year old house, I would still love mixing old and new in my decorating style. One of the ways I've done this is with lighting. We have old schoolhouse lights in our kitchen that I love. And now that the kitchen is finished we're working on the bathroom renovation.  And Barn Light Electric is where I would like to purchase the lighting - which is why I need to win their giveaway!  Of course, when I looked for ideas for the bathroom, I saw more lights for the other rooms of the house.

The Triple Botswick Bath Light for the upstairs bathrooms (even the non-gutted one).

Two Barn Light Radial Cast Guard CGU Sconces for M & JJ's room (to go in each built-in bed, because hey, I'm already dreaming).

The Halsted Semi-Flush Ceiling Light for the powder room downstairs - or the upstairs foyer - or both!

And a Cape Cod Barn Lantern right outside the front door.

Winning would make me really, really happy.  :)

Want to join in on the fun?

1. Look around online at Barn Light Electric and pick lights you'd love to win.

2.Share your picks on your blog and link to the lights if you can.

3.Copy and paste these rules at the bottom of your blog post.

4. Once your post is up, you must email your blog link to: contest@barnlightelectric.com to be qualified to win. The contest ends October 12th, 2011.