Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Hopeful

This is what the girls were singing this morning on the way to school:

"Jesus is better than Easter eggs!  And God is the best person in the world!" 

At least some things are sinking in. 

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

A follow-up to Sunday

After my rough day on Sunday, Jeff decided to catch up on my last month or two of posts.  I asked him what he thought of my post and he said "I don't really check your blog much because you don't post that often".  True.  But I'm trying to be better at it.  So, he read it later and after showering me with praise for being a literary blog genius (hardly) - he said he was worried about protecting our kids.  He knows that I need an outlet so I don't go crazy with the stress (too late), but he wishes he could be there right next to people who are reading the posts so he can stand up for our kids because they are pretty. freaking. awesome.  For instance, if people think things like, "why don't you try a special diet?", or "maybe you need to discipline her better", or "she seems totally fine to me all the times I've spent a mere 30 minutes around her", he can then puff up his chest and prepare to kick some a** to defend our babies like a crazed duck at Tilles Park.  (I used to be scared to take M there because they were really violent when they had ducklings.)  He doesn't want people to judge her (& JJ) because they are incredible people.  Truly amazing individuals.  And while I might get frustrated with them and some most days I think to myself "we are DEFINITELY done having children", I love them more than anything else in this world.  There is nothing "wrong" with them.  They are both unique and have different strengths and abilities.  M might have a diagnosis on the Autism spectrum, but she is insanely talented in her artwork and super creative and also very loving.  JJ might be a drama queen, but she is the funniest kid, loves her friends, and always surprises us.  I understand Jeff wanting to shake people who think something totally different to that effect.  I love how he loves and protects our girls.  But I hope that those who read my blog will be reading because they get it.  Because if you don't, then you really shouldn't waste your time reading my blog anyways. 

But you should check out this blog

stark. raving. mad. mommy.

I just found her the other day through my friend Katie (thank you!).  Today's post is wonderful.  And the other day when she had a Top Ten of what you shouldn't say to a parent whose child is on the spectrum.  We need more moms (and non-moms!) out there who don't judge.  Isn't there some unwritten code of womanhood that we look out for each other?  Well, there should be.  I have unfortunately been the subject of a woman's ignorance to the code and it just plain sucks. 

Tonight we have a fun dinner with our house group from church and the girls are invited.  I love the people who are hosting.  I love our whole house group, actually.  I am really thankful for them.  I'm thankful for everyone at our church - there are some beautiful women there (and I'm talking about what's on the inside.  That's what counts anyways.), who encourage me and love me regardless of anything.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Rough Day

I'm having a rough day today.  I should be enjoying a day with my girls while Jeff is fishing, but nothing has been going right.  I didn't get to go to church - which I desperately need because I've worked in the nursery two weeks straight and I need to be spiritually fed - because after I dropped off the girls in their classrooms, I heard screaming from the hallway outside the auditorium.  I had a feeling it was my kid.  And it was.  I attempted to get her back in her classroom and I was able to listen to the sermon for about 5 minutes before the teacher came and got me.  So we left.  And JJ wouldn't take a nap today no matter how hard I tried.  And she NEEDS it because she had her birthday party yesterday and she's coming off of a sugar high so she's really cranky.  I need to think of something for the next 8 hours until my wonderful husband returns home so I don't feel like I'm giving up on motherhood today and my girls feel loved.  It's HARD right now.  I wanted to cry in church because everyone was looking at me and none of them understand.  At least I didn't break down crying like I did last month at Party City when M pulled all of the balloons out of the bins and spread them all over the floor and the snotty moms gave me dirty looks and muttered to themselves that "she should really clean that up".  I love the people at my church so I didn't feel exactly the same as the Party City day when I wanted to shout: "JUST BUY YOUR CRAPPY JUSTIN BIEBER BALLOONS AND GO!  YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO HAVE A KID WITH AUTISM!"